It has been a great 16 months I should say. This chapter of my life is coming to an end in 22 days to be exact. A trip to Christchurch and Wellington and then home sweet home. This party planner has been 'hired' to plan mommy's 60th Bday on 19th Dec and Daddy turns 68 on 20th Dec. Dec seems to be filled for now :-) and there goes my job hunting. This 16mths have sure been a roller coaster ride for me but this experience has definitely made me stronger. The friends Ive made, the people I came across and all the hardships and emotions that i have gone through has made life much richer for me.
The 3 weeks with S before he went back to his wife and kids, was really comforting. An angel who came into my life at the right time to lift me up, showing me what love, care and concern really is. "I followed you behind the workshop and chat you up. You were in jeans and white top, do you remember? Even your friends knew I was following you. I was always attracted to you." I just looked into his eyes in amazement! How am I to remember an incident 18 years ago?!? My heart melts when he plays the guitar and sings. He is everything a woman would want her partner to be. We had loads of fun talking about school days, shopping (this fashion guru made him buy a pink and green shirt haha), cooking, singing, clubbing and not forgetting our movie marathons. It was sure great to be in someone's arms (pumped and strong :P) and to be loved and cared for. But like how all good things come to an end, it was time for another goodbye. I was strong until he held me close to him and whispered "thanks for everything, and take care of yourself." Those familiar words and I broke down. I could see the redness in his eyes. The last flying kiss and he was gone.
The goodbye with V in Sydney airport was very different. It was nice of him to hang around until I boarded the plane. No hugs, no kisses, he didnt look at my face even. A quick cheek to cheek, "take care", no looking back and we walked in opposite directions. I cried all the way, through my journey from Sydney to Melbourne. Leaving him, I felt so lost, as if a part of me had gone with him. I confined myself to my room for days until S called me one day. S knew how much I love and miss V. I havent heard from V and this is it I guess. A married friend of mine told me yesterday "you know he is THE ONE, when he is a bad arse and you really want him in your life." Ive always wanted V in my life. He is one person I have done crazy things for. I forget myself when Im with him. He aint loving nor caring but somehow my heart only seeks for him. Crazy right? yeah i know, my middle name is "mad".
This year has also been ex boyfriends confession year. One says he regrets not coming back to me after we broke up. He said it was his ego that stopped him from doing so. The other says he broke up because of inferiority complex. He said I had a good relationship with family and friends and he loved the way I interacted with them. He apparently forced himself to leave me because he was more of a recluse. Well i never knew this in 10 years! Looking back, all my exes still keep in touch with me and I realised i did have a positive impact in all their lives that im remembered for.
The last few weeks in Melbourne. Gym, friends, cooking, drinking and outings. Paul loves my cooking and I told him he is my guinea pig, lol! Im gona make him some fish sambal tday. Think his taste buds are dead from all the vegetarian food his wife has been cooking. This is how its been for the past few weeks. Being single is great and im enjoying every bit of it. This is how my life is gona be. Love is out of the radar but Im still holding on to my hopes that ONE DAY my LOVE would come back to me :P.. I love my LIFE...Jay was saying I could write a book about my life, apparently its a very interesting one...looking back I feel the same too huauhauha
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